The Marginally Above – Average Adviser


There’s a guy who sits in my brain. I think he likes it up there. Perhaps, he finds it safe, forever protected by the veil of an actual human being acting out his will. Perhaps, behind the curtain of the present situation is where he thrives – using it as a sieve to filter out elements that pollute, and refining the ones that don’t. I talk to him sometimes. I run ideas by him, and take his advice. He is often quite confident about the veracity of his assertions, although I am not always sure.

I have been through a few situations in the last year or so that I have, on initial inspection, assessed as failures. They were definitely setbacks on some particular front, and forced me to think, pause, learn, unlearn, plan, and act.

The guy in my head went –

“Well, that didn’t work out.”

Yeah, no shit, guy. Where do we go from here?

“I would suggest eating some chicken, followed by a healthy consumption of digital content on Netflix, concluded with many hours of sleep.”

I must admit, it worked. For a while. Inevitably, there comes another situation of questionable success, and the rhetorical –

“Boy, we really tanked that one, huh?”

Yeah, it’s been 6 months, you can stop reminding me.

“Hey, you know I only bring it up because we’re not done talking about it. There’s something you’re holding back.”

Yeah, a punch to your face. That’s what I’m holding back.

“You gotta stop fighting me, my man. I’m on your side.”

Your advice got me here in the first place. How do I even trust you?

“I know I don’t always get it right, and I don’t try to either. I simply tell you what I truly believe is right in that moment, and you do what you do best – roll with whatever road that takes us on.”

Yeah, I guess we gotta bear with our shit. Where do we go from here?

“Forward. How does that sound?”

Like you’re intentionally trying to deliver poignant-sounding advice.

“Sorry, my bad. Let’s get some chicken. And then Netflix.”

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